GROUND ZERO
Hello world . How is you all doing? I hope you had a shittier day than mine. Because that would somehow make me feel better.! I went to school to read for my physics resit. The math resit did not turn out as I expected since the exchange lecturer set questions not in our course outline. And I need to pass at least one of the three resits to move on to third year! Of the three. Calculus was the easiest. Do not know how I failed the paper in the first place. On the way to the library ( yes I finally found out where it is) I hear that those that had missed hostel rooms are outside the HQ complaining. The school has empty rooms but denied students for reasons that we could obviously guess. They want to rent them out to outsiders at exorbitant prices. The Director for hostels is one fucked up son of a bitch. Rude, unprofessional and whatever. In short I still do not have a hostel room.
In the middle of walking from campus to campus, trying to keep up with the hostel issue and still the exam issue I meet a fellow student who tells me I am resitting a physics paper because the lecturer did not add my CAT marks to my end year exam marks! What the fuck? What kind of education system is this? Kenya rocks.
8 hours later, I feel worn out and go to a friends hostel to have my belated lunch. I was so hungry from the random walking and had obviously not had breakfast. One hour later, at 8 pm. I get the news that students from my campus had broken into the hostel custodians office and taken the keys to the empty rooms! Wow!
So no empty rooms which means no chance of me avoiding home everyday. I walked to the bus stage thinking this over and this is where the highlight of my day was. As I walked all I was thinking were some very dark thoughts. Very very dark thoughts. The problem is that they made me feel good! This is why I do not like being alone sometimes. I am a fan of myself. I savour solitude. I like being with myself but sometimes I need to be around people to curb my going crazy. This coming to home daily will not work with me. It really won't.
I cannot wait for tomorrow to see what will be running in my mind! If I continue having days like this week's then I just might change the name of this blog to MY DARK THOUGHTS. Because all I will be writing is dark thoughts. And nothing but! Not to show off or anything but that would be a way to like curb myself from actually doing them. Because I am good at that. Finding out ways to deal with shit in my life. So if this continues I will need a way to overcome it. And I am hoping blogging will help. Because I have never tried it. Ignoring shit and passive aggression is so outdated. Haha! Note to self : Find out if me is passive aggressive. I do not even know what that means.
Anyway if this is the change that I am getting then I think I will accept it. Lets see what it is going to turn me into. Something worse than I am now but at least it is change. And that is what I wanted. Right?
In the middle of walking from campus to campus, trying to keep up with the hostel issue and still the exam issue I meet a fellow student who tells me I am resitting a physics paper because the lecturer did not add my CAT marks to my end year exam marks! What the fuck? What kind of education system is this? Kenya rocks.
8 hours later, I feel worn out and go to a friends hostel to have my belated lunch. I was so hungry from the random walking and had obviously not had breakfast. One hour later, at 8 pm. I get the news that students from my campus had broken into the hostel custodians office and taken the keys to the empty rooms! Wow!
So no empty rooms which means no chance of me avoiding home everyday. I walked to the bus stage thinking this over and this is where the highlight of my day was. As I walked all I was thinking were some very dark thoughts. Very very dark thoughts. The problem is that they made me feel good! This is why I do not like being alone sometimes. I am a fan of myself. I savour solitude. I like being with myself but sometimes I need to be around people to curb my going crazy. This coming to home daily will not work with me. It really won't.
I cannot wait for tomorrow to see what will be running in my mind! If I continue having days like this week's then I just might change the name of this blog to MY DARK THOUGHTS. Because all I will be writing is dark thoughts. And nothing but! Not to show off or anything but that would be a way to like curb myself from actually doing them. Because I am good at that. Finding out ways to deal with shit in my life. So if this continues I will need a way to overcome it. And I am hoping blogging will help. Because I have never tried it. Ignoring shit and passive aggression is so outdated. Haha! Note to self : Find out if me is passive aggressive. I do not even know what that means.
Anyway if this is the change that I am getting then I think I will accept it. Lets see what it is going to turn me into. Something worse than I am now but at least it is change. And that is what I wanted. Right?
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