Two Fourteen

Somewhere is Nairobi. A young couple is enjoying the evening in each others' company while watching the news.  suddenly the lady gets the urge to log into her online community. Her : (rummaging through her bag)  I can't find my phone. Ebu flash me with yours. Him : (Unconcerned, And not particularly pleased with getting interrupted while watching TV) Okay. What's your number? Her : Ai Babekins. You don't know my number off head? Him : You bought that line like yesterday. I never crammed it but i've saved it on my phone. (realizing he didn't have his phone with him) Hand it over to me it's over there charging. Her : It's okay let me do it. (Walks up to the socket and unplugs it) How have you saved me? Him : (Amused) You don't know your own number? Then how did you expe.... (deciding it's not worth it) You are speed dial number two. Her : (Confused, angry and hurt all at once) What!? Why not one? Which bitch is speed dial one? Him : Babe rel...

      I am a big fan of motorbikes. I really am. I even have plans of getting an Aprilia or a Ducati before life (read marriage) forces me to settle down. I think they are cool and powerful and might get me laid a lot (oh these great and wonderful ambitions I have). Of late however, I think I am going to have to change my dreams (and ambitions) because of these bodabodas . If you have never been to Kenya (or you are rich) you definitely haven't had the displeasure of interacting with these deathtraps. With the economic rise of these Asian industries, a lot of things have made made affordable and among them; motorcycles. These bikes are so cheap that every Tom, Dick and Harry can buy them. And they have. The country is now littered by them. They are mostly used as taxis ( bodaboda ). The rise of the bodaboda business has been both great and bad. Mostly bad. Yes they give jobs to the youth and all but most of these bodaboda riders are very incompetent, so it is usually a gl...

Seven months of struggling, sweating, late nights and a lot of shillings later, I am through with my field report. Hot damn it feels good. Hot damn, it’s been long. I had even forgotten about the field study. It was in August last year, in the wilderness, for 40 28 days. Remember that? Probably not. The field work was hard and long but the report writing should have not even taken more than 2 weeks. We could have been through with it by September, but this being a third world country, our labs lacked equipment for analyzing samples and we had to take them to the government labs, and we all know how those are. Add high levels of procrastinations to that and you have report of 60 pages taking a whole 6 months to write. Kenya. Anyway, 3 weeks ago, we finally got all the data we needed and truthfully, that is when the real report writing began. On the day of handing in the reports however we were hit with something we didn’t expect. Together with the hard copy (which cost an arm and 3 fin...

    Got this post from one of the blogs I am subscribed to  . I just had to reblog it. Permission has been borrowed of course) All about sex I arrived in Jeju yesterday afternoon and caught a quick nap to make up for a lack of sleep throughout the overnight flight. When I woke up, it was already past 4pm and I decided to visit a nearby attraction before the sky darkens. A quick look at the map and I found my destination - Jeju Loveland. Check out their welcum sign Opened in 2004, Jeju Loveland is a park with 140 sex-inspired sculptures. And I do not mean scultptures that are vaguely shaped like sex-related products or actions and which require much pondering to understand what the sculpture is trying to say. At Jeju Loveland, the sculptures whip their messages right in your face. I was greeted before the entrance by a marble replica of my best friend: They even have this phallus statue ready to shoot. Veins and shiny head. I was so tempted to strike a more vulgar pose, sa...

     I did my laundry on Saturday and Sunday. The chore left me very weekend(!). I have no closet so I just dump my clothes on a suitcase that is on the floor. I do not do anything fancy like folding or colour coordinating them. I just pile them up in a heap. That proved to be a problem today because now I cannot tell between my clean clothes and my dirty ones. Which could mean two things. (1) I did not wash my clothes that well or (2) My dirty clothes are not that dirty anyway. I decided it was the latter. I have all my 'panties' up in a bunch     My sister is on holiday. Done with high school. And this time we pray for higher grades. We had her go to a school that had performed well in the previous years and so we think she will do well. At least that is what I hoped, until she told me something interesting today.      I have been to that school of hers. On days that I have remembered that it's her Visiting Day. It is hideous! the wall...

       This being another academic year, we are  again   faced with the challenge of choosing units that we will be taking. And just like last year, the methods of deciding are not very career-oriented. What ideally should be happening is, students choose the units that more in sync with the career paths that they want. More in tune with their love and passion. More logical. But that is not what is happening. What most guys seem bent on is taking units that will guarantee an A, regardless of whether or not it will help their careers. The way it works is, despite what units you do, as long as you get first class honors, you can follow any career path. Sounds twisted but it is true, to some point, and students know this so they opt to choose units using other criteria.       Some decided they will not choose any unit that falls on a Monday, just to make their weekends longer. Some decided they wanted to start their weekend early so they opted a...

     Today I finished watching The Wire. Watched every season back to back. I remember seeing that show back when it was popular. I was too young to enjoy it, I think. Those high school years when I wanted a FOX show that is straight to the point. Where the good guy is the good guy from episode 1 to the 34th. I blame the 8-4-4 system. Makes it difficult for one to think outside of the carton. But now that my brain activity has increased a whole 0.1 per cent, I have grown intelligenter and I now enjoy shows with a good script more than the ones with just fight scenes. Any way I just finished 60 episodes of this one hour show and all I can think is I need to look for 70 more hours to watch it again because this shit right here is the bomb. The show is worth the hype.      My only issue was that it takes so long for the momentum of the story to pick up. I was not interested in the first season until like the fourth episode. Unlike The Shield. Which s...

     Some guys assume that since I know what USB stands for, I am a computer guru. As a matter of fact, I have done no professional computer classes. I did MS Word. Does that count? Not to me it does not. But still people assume I know everything. Truth is I know enough.  Ian asked me to take him buy a good new computer for 30K. I did not know such  place but I made some few calls and got a place. There was a core 2 duo Pavillion dv6 for 36K and a Core 2 Duo Vostro for 32K. Problem was Ian wanted a brand new laptop. The ones which he opens the box and shit. The kind of shit that you buy from Safaricom. Overpriced computers with nothing of value. This shop we were in had no such laptops because they only dealt with mostly high end stuff.       But he did want either because they did not come in a box. For all he cared, they were used. All we wanted to do was unwrap a new computer himself. Why? Because that is what the sister wanted....