DRIVING AN EXAM INTO A WEDDING

This one of the posts that I somehow never get to publish. Dunno why. The date is someday last year  



Sunday. Exams start tomorrow. I should be reading right? Wrong!! Well actually you are right I am just being stubborn. I should in fact be reading. But why am I not? Natasha's got a flu. And not just any normal cold flu. This shit right here is swine flu! She cannot do shit. And all my notes are in shit copy. No PDF can open, no word document, no PowerPoint. Nothing useful. Oh the videos play though. Yeah. Decided to watch Drive Angry while I thought about how fucked I was since I decided not to have money to print out my notes. That flick was such a guy movie. Fast muscle cars, hot chicks that can kick ass, people that can take a shot in the head. Unnecessary explosions. Ass and tits! What! I don't think I even got the story line well. Wait I think I did. Milton escaped from hell to save his grand daughter from a culticious Jonah who had murdered Milton's daughter and was planning to sacrifice the said granddaughter because they thought that that was what the devil wanted. The Devil sent out a person to get Milton back in Hell, The Accountant, and that to me was my best character. Played by William Fitchner.

    Anyway, back to the problem. How does Natasha always seem to get herself in shit whenever I am not around. Is this a way of her telling me never to leave her alone with someone else. If so, I am sorry Natasha I went to that wedding yesterday and left you to me touched and pushed by other people. I should have gone with you even though you would have just been dead weight. dead meaning battery and weight meaning your size. Dammit woman slimmen up!!

     The wedding. That was annoying. You think people lie while giving the eulogy at the funeral, wait till you hear the toast at the wedding. I may just agree to have a wedding just to hear people boost my ego. But seriously, I hope all that was said was true and I wish the two the best 5 years together, before kids come and the loans builds up and that annoying aunty-in-law moves in.

     The wedding was sweet. To speak honestly. Held at Oak Place in Kiambu and a photo shoot at Windsor Golf club near by. These are the kind of places you go and keep reminding yourself, 'I am still in Kenya. I am still in Kenya'. It was both exciting and depressing. If you are a normal Kenyan you know why, if you are not, well I guess you will have to pretty much figure it out on yourself. I took pictures. Even videos especially the you-may-now-suck-on-the-bride’s-face part. But they all got corrupted. It was really unfortunate seeing as my sole reason for being invited to that wedding was to take family photos. Thank God, I was not the official photographer. That would have been the memorylessiest wedding ever. Anyway. I managed to salvage a few photos. Enough actually. Of the hot bridesmaids mostly.

     That is why I am not freaking out that I cannot get this computer to open any of my notes. Shit been happening to me lately since WORST WEEK and I have almost gotten used to it. I am just flowing with the go. Because , like I realized that week, the more I fight it, the more it fights back. And now that I know I am jinxed, try not and give me anything valuable of yours okay?


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